What You Will Do Matters More Than What You Will Be

From the earliest years, children are bombarded with the question: "What are you going to be when you grow up?"  The emphasis on "be" in this question implies that the end goal of growing up is to become something definitive, something fixed. But this question misses the point. Instead, we should be asking, "What are you going to do?"

There's a misconception that one goes through school, emerges with a degree, and voila, becomes a doctor, or any other profession, and lives happily ever after. This couldn't be further from the truth. Our lives are in perpetual motion and growth. If you're on track to "be a doctor," what you're really on track for is to practice medicine, to engage in a lifelong process of learning and serving.

The pursuit of a career is a journey, not a destination. If your eyes are fixed on the title, the reality will hit hard the day after you achieve it, when you're expected to start living it out. Titles come with responsibilities, not just prestige.

Consider the chilling case of Christopher Duntsch, the neurosurgeon whose gross malpractice earned him the nickname "Dr. Death."

This extreme example of the "be" complex doesn't always end in tragedy; more often, it manifests quietly around the world. I've known many who trudge through their careers, motivated solely by a paycheck, living for the weekends, and enduring the workweek. Such individuals may never advance their fields with innovation or discovery, as their actions are not driven by passion but by expectation.

Conversely, by conducting a "Fearless Inventory" of oneself, as encouraged in 12-step programs, you can discover your innate talents and start doing. Take inspiration from trailblazers like Steve Irwin, Mr. Rogers, and Cesar Millan. Their career paths might not have seemed lucrative or glamorous at first, but they were driven by a clear mission.

Steve Irwin set out to teach conservation through daring wildlife encounters. Mr. Rogers aimed to educate children with puppetry and song. Cesar Millan aspired to transform relationships between dogs and their owners. These individuals might have faced skepticism, yet they changed history and are revered for their contributions.

For true fulfillment I urge you to reflect on what you want to do with your life, rather than how you might impress others. A mansion may seem less appealing if its walls echo with a lack of passion for your work.

If you're struggling with ADHD and uncertain about your career path, consider the "Breaking the Paralysis: Getting Hired with ADHD" course at BrightMindADHD.com. I created this course to help individuals with ADHD find jobs that align with their core values.

Stephanie McGuinn, founder of Bright Mind ADHD and an Accountability Coach, is passionate about empowering adults with ADHD to thrive. Don't hesitate to start your journey by reaching out at [email protected].